Tuesday, June 14, 2011

"Rain falls angry on the tin roof"

The sky looks slightly gray, and I am praying that rain would come and pour through the cracks in our parched lawn and revive the hostas that are succumbing to the ferrous heat of this summer. I might take Charlotte outside and let her feel and taste the sweetness of much needed water. She has yet to experience the delight of a cooling summer rain, and today may remedy that. Yet, I am not holding my breath because there is still much sunshine amidst the graying cirrus sky.

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We went ahead and watered many plants this morning, and pools of sweat lined both our foreheads. Charlotte rode on my back as I watered, weeded, and sprayed the yard which has now lost its spring luster. Instead it looks dry, overgrown, and in much need of a gardener's diligent hand. However, time and heat are keeping this gardener from her work...that and a little baby girl.

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Our church's VBS is in full swing currently, and I am enjoying the time to get to know more children at Riverside. I leave the program early every night to feed and put the baby to bed. Even though I am only gone about two hours Charlotte does not like the current arrangement. As I often tell people, she is a wonderful baby as long as I do what she wants: be with her 24/7, nurse her whenever she wants, and hold her a large part of the day.

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This new nighttime agenda does not fall into Charlotte's plan, and she is making her daddy work hard every night to keep her happy. But I have no doubt she will survive and Friday will bring restoration to the schedule.

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We are all looking forward to a weekend at home. This weekend is our rain for we have been parched from travel and are in need of soaking rest. I have the typical mile long to-do list rumbling around in my head. But as I look at Charlotte babbling in her bumbo and think of Ben working hard to allow me this time at home; I am going to let the list dissipate from my mind. Instead of a Saturday filled with to-do's, I'm longing for a day with my little family. Maybe we will finally get that plastic haven called a baby pool; or it might pour all day and allow us the luxury of movies and board games. Whatever we do, I just want to soak it in. I want to laugh and twirl Charlotte around the room. I want to watch Lilly chase bumble bees on our deck. I want to rest in the crook on my husband's arm and tell him just how wonderful he his. To-do's will be there when the week starts back.

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One more note before I am off to water more plants because the blazing sun has dispelled all hope for rain. Tuesday, Charlotte meets with an ophthalmologist in Birmingham to look at her wandering eyes. We are hoping that no surgery will be needed and have heard that patches are often used to strengthen the eyes. But what I really want is a magic cure. I am ashamed to say it but I don't want to patch those big beautiful blues. They take me in, her eyes. Every time I look into them I reel at the love and joy she has brought to my life.

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Yes, I am aware that it is much better than surgery. Yet, the possibility of a patch saddens my heart (as foolish as that may be). You all have been so supportive in this journey and I ask you to once again pray for my baby girl. I ask you to pray for me as well: for continued acceptance of the path we are on and peace when the road diverges from the route I thought we were taking.

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4 comments:

Dana said...

Love the pictures of Lily & Cha-shy! :) We are also praying for rain. Everything is crunchy outside. Will be praying for the appt on Tuesday! Have fun this week/weekend at home!

Francie Likis (not to be confused with Francie Chica) said...

Love reading your blog, Esther! Charlotte does have the most amazing eyes, and I am praying they are perfect without any human intervention. I meant to tell you at the wedding how proud I am that you are still breastfeeding. I'm sure I have never been to a wedding with so many breast pumps : ) Love you and look forward to seeing you again in October if not before.

Susan B. said...

You have a BEAUTIFUL baby! She should be in commercials. Watch it! You're gonna have to fight off the boys in a few years! I don't see her eyes wandering. I think you'll get a good report from the doc. Give her a big ole kiss from her aunt Choo Choo.

Love ya!

Anonymous said...

Finally some refreshing rain for you and for me. I hope that your weekend as refreshing as well. Love you and miss you every day. Praying for the eye doctor visit on Tuesday. DAD