Tuesday, April 17, 2012

"Who am I, that the Lord of all the Earth/ Would care to know my name/ Would care to feel my hurt"

I wanted to quickly post pictures from Easter before we head to Birmingham for Charlotte's surgery.

We decided to celebrate the silly side of Easter (bunnies, egg hunts, etc.) on Saturday and leave Sunday as the day to celebrate the RISEN KING. I think we will stick to this way of doing things. Charlotte's basket was duck themed this year. I had a blast filling it from the dollar section at Target!

Photobucket

a little sleepy

Photobucket

The girls had a blast looking through their loot together.

Photobucket
Photobucket
Photobucket

And what is Easter without a bunny ear headband!

Photobucket
Sorry Dad but I'm going to have to say Lia wore it best :)
Photobucket

Now for the Hunt!

Photobucket
Photobucket
Photobucket

Charlotte wasn't a fan of the bunny ears.

Photobucket

The girls did great together and by the end had combined all their eggs.

Photobucket

We actually managed to get a family photo on Easter which are few and far between these days.

Photobucket

One of my favorite parts of the week was blowing bubbles with Lia. She LOVED them.

Photobucket

I love how children remind us of the joy of simple things.

Photobucket

And her enthusiasm reminds me so much of Henry.

Photobucket

It was a wonderful week and hard to see it end, especially knowing what lay ahead. Sunday, as I drove back from a wedding in Auburn to pick up Charlotte in Covington, the weight of the week hit me. This surgery is not so sudden or frightening as shunt surgery. Yet, I realized as I drove that once again I will have to leave her to a nurse she doesn't know in a place she doesn't like. I cried most of the way home and prayed for strength. It made me think of Eve and the curse that is inflicted on all mothers. Yes, birth itself is a painful process but I think our consequence is more than the pain of labor. It is the continuous pain of loving a human being so much. It seems that this is our course as mothers: the great joy mixed with the great sorrow of having our hearts roaming outside our body.

My heart breaks as I think of what lays ahead this Wednesday. Yet, God has been continuously faithful to our family. I am so grateful for how well Charlotte has done. He has blessed me beyond measure by bringing Ben and I together, giving us Charlotte, and now Margaret. He places trials in all our lives and I know they are small compared to the burden of what we deserve. I'm asking that He once again protect my daughter, give me strength and courage as her mother, and even when it seems against the grain: "to count it all joy".
Photobucket

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

"To every thing: Turn, Turn Turn. There is a season: Turn, Turn, Turn. And a time for every purpose, under Heaven."

I hope everyone has had a joy filled Easter. We headed down to celebrate the Holiday in Covington. Charlotte and I are still here. Ben kindly agreed to let us stay for the week so we could have some much needed family time. She is napping right now so I thought I’d take the time to catch up.

We have had a wonderful visit with my family. Saturday, was a full day with an Easter egg hunt for the girls, a birthday party at lunch for Dana, my mom, and myself, and a Passover supper that evening. The Easter Hunt was tons of fun. We put Charlotte in her braces so she could practice walking to find the eggs. Both girls seemed to have a grand time and were quite content with 3 or 4 eggs. Lunch was delicious and like all meals at my parents, I ate till I was ill. I’m not sure when my parents started the tradition of celebrating Passover but we have done it since I was little. This year the girls babbled and watched curiously as we recited the traditional sayings. I am sure in a few years they will be participating in the festivities.

Sunday we celebrated the joy of Easter with a wonderful service at the church I grew up in. I always love coming back and visiting with the many friends who have prayed for me since I was a child and who now pray for my daughter. The body of Christ is an amazing blessing in my life. A very special treat was getting to see my lifelong friend Meghan and her sweet baby Josey. Holding Josey made me so excited for the arrival of Margaret. After visiting with friends we headed back to my parents and stuffed ourselves with way too much food. In fact, that is what I have done this whole week! I’m afraid my OB is going to give me a weight warning at the next visit.

I took many pictures of all the festivities but will have to wait to post them till I’m back home. And it will most likely take me awhile because next week is CRAZY. Saturday, I have a wedding outside of Auburn and then Sunday I’ll head back to Covington to pick up Charlotte and drive home to Scottsboro. Monday, she has a pediatrician appointment for a physical in preparation for her eye surgery. Tuesday morning we have an official closing on our new home and that afternoon we head to Birmingham. Wednesday is Charlotte’s actual surgery but we still do not know times yet. We are praying it will be in the morning because she is not allowed to eat or drink after midnight. We are also hoping to head back home that same day so that she can recover in familiar territory.

These busy weeks are making time fly by! I can’t believe I’m only 7 ½ weeks from my due date!! And I have belly pictures.

These are at 30 weeks:

Photobucket
Photobucket

And I snapped these today (almost 33 weeks) for a more up to date look.

Photobucket
Photobucket


As you can see, my belly is expanding at rapid rates. I am already bigger than when I delivered Charlotte. I suppose that is from the fact that this is my second pregnancy and the muscles in my stomach aren’t what they use to be. Not that I’ve ever had much in the way of ab muscles though!

My mom and I were thinking that Margaret might be a bigger baby since I’m getting bigger this time around. However, I had an OB apt last Thursday and was measuring a bit small. They sent me in for an ultra sound to make sure Margaret did not have any growth retardation. She measured at 30 weeks and I was at 32, but they said everything look good which was a huge relief. She was also breech during the ultrasound and I am greatly hoping that she does not get comfortable in this position.

Other than being on a See food diet (I see it, I eat it), leg cramps, and some very bad back pain (mostly due to therapy with Charlotte) this pregnancy seems to be going smoothly. The 3rd trimester is always long and I am so ready to be out of maternity clothes; especially as the weather heats up. But I also feel the anxiety of all that I have left to do before Margaret’s arrival. May doesn’t seem quite as crazy as this month. Yet, we do have 2 clinics for Charlotte which can be fairly draining.

I was lamenting to my mom that I keep making daily to do lists and then I never can accomplish all that is on them! I know, and here I am vacationing at my parents :) I have gotten a few things accomplished while I’ve been here. But I came because I felt the need for a break and perspective. The world continues to revolve even though I haven’t sewn pillows for Charlotte’s bed or organized Margaret’s closet. I feel like I’ve spent much more quality time with Charlotte since I have been home, because I haven’t been running around trying to get all the to-do’s done. And I know I need to savor this one on one time with her. Things will soon be different and my time will be split between two girls. I don’t consider this a bad thing but it makes me know I need to cherish these moments.

And speaking of cherishing moments….Ben and I recently took Charlotte for her first boat ride since last summer. She was not a fan of the wind, but once we got to the point of merely trolling she had a wonderful time.

Photobucket
Photobucket

She kept wanting to reach out and touch the water. Had I not been securely holding her, she would have climbed head first into the lake. Charlotte also touched her first fish that her daddy caught for her. I see a pink fishing pole in her future!

Photobucket
Photobucket